Over the past few weeks I spent a lot of time meditating and reflecting on the things I've done in the past and the things I want to do in the future. Keeping a daily journal is something that has helped me tremendously over the years. Writing has always been a way for me to express so much of myself and sometimes it helps me to better understand my own wants and desires through a process of self reflection, re-evaluating what's important and what matters, and being able to see the hardships and struggles manifest into something so beautiful and worthwhile. It also feels good to just let it all out instead of holding it all in (and the best thing about it is, it doesn't talk back).
Sometimes when you are in the pit of darkness and distress, it's hard to see things clearly and understand why God lets bad things happen to people. However in retrospect, I've learned the most from my greatest mistakes and my greatest hardships. God is so good and he knows us so well. His timing is perfect and his love is so deep and unconditional.
I love this following bible passage because it helps me to trust in God even when times are tough. Sometimes when I get anxious or when I doubt God is hearing me out, I am reminded of this verse.
New International Version (NIV)
5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
6 in all your ways submit to him,
and he will make your paths straight.[a]
Submitting to God has been a great struggle for me up until more recently. I hate to admit it, but I guess I can be a little bit of a "control freak". I'm so used to being in control of my own life and believe it or not, I have very little patience when I have to wait for something longer than expected. Perhaps that's why in 2011 God has been teaching me to be "patient" and in the process of waiting for him to answer my prayers, he has taught me to appreciate life as is. To count my blessings and to know that everything I already have is a gift that I did not deserve in the first place. I am re-learning to appreciate my body, my mind, and most importantly my spirituality and really trying to deepen the core of who I really am. It's all very new and exciting for me. :) Sometimes masking your life by keeping too busy can do more damage in the end because you don't get to the root of any of your problems. Blogging about fitness and health has become a tool for me to not only keep myself accountable this year but to also stay motivated in living a healthier and happier life for a brighter future. I hope 2012 will be a fantastic year for everyone! Thanks for reading my entries! Happy New Year!
SOME MOTIVATION FOR 2012: